Thursday, October 21, 2010

What Do You Deserve?

What do you deserve is a question I pose to all of my clients. Asking what do you want is great but you can want it, but if you don't feel like you deserve it then you won't put in the work for it. Deserve means to be worthy of. Lets look at that for a moment.... TO BE WORTHY OF!!!! You as a human being is worthy of everything in this world. You are a worthy of having everything that you deserve AND more. However, it won't fall into your lap because you say you are worthy. You have to work for those things.The truth is in order to have the things you want, even if you think you are deserving it does take work.

There was this person I knew once who worked hard all throughout school. Their grades were great, attendance was perfect and the relationship with the teachers was well formed. This person was worthy of the rewards of a successful academic career. However, due to a lack of motivation towards academics and more of drive towards romance, what they once deserved was taken away. This person chose the path that they thought was the correct one but in the end due to lack of work in both academic and romantic endeavors that person became unworthy and eventually lost both things.

It takes a considerable amount of maintenance to keep the things that we are deserving of and the desire for some of those things will eventually fade, we let them go and work towards a different set of goals. I often hear people say that they deserve I am in no position to say who is deserving of what. However, I do know that if you prove to be unworthy all of those things that you think you deserve will indeed fade away or never manifest themselves in your life.

Naturally we say, we want success, but do you deserve it? Are you worthy of it? Well are you putting in the work for it? You cannot possibly be worthy  of success if you are not putting in the work to be successful. Ask yourself, am I getting up early enough to make it to work on time? Am I showing my boss that I am worthy of keeping my job by being on time? Once I am at work, am I a working on my tasks consistently? Am I finishing my assignments on time? Am I doing impeccable work. Be honest with yourself and see if you deserve your job...are you worthy of your job? This maybe tough to answer but you must be honest with yourself to see why your life doesn't work.

Your life can be full of worth and deserving of great things but YOU have to be focused on what it is you need to do. You can have love, you can have happiness, you can have all the success but there are things that you need to put in place in order to make sure that you get the things that you deserve. You cannot possibly say that you want success and you go to sleep at three and wake up at noon.  You cannot possible say that you want a great job but you are unsuccessful and grumpy with the one that you have. You cannot possibly want wealth if you have the same old routine and dealing with the same people. You cannot want love but you have no self love. You cannot expect to have happiness if you are holding on to gloom. It just cannot and will not work.

Life is beautiful and it can be the greatest thing if you make it. Organize your life in a way that will make you worthy. Worthiness does not just come because you say, you MUST work for it and then and only then will you receive everything that you deserve. It takes work, but once you begin to do the work and put all the steps into play, it will be second nature and it will all fall into place. It is all in your word though...all in your word.


Not sure how to find your worth? Unsure of how to organize your life?

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Telephone: (201)-500-7146

Thursday, October 14, 2010

BEING GAY IS A SIN....(says who?)

I have been dancing and struggling with this topic for weeks now and I have said a few things but today I am ready to bare all.

I know that all three major religions have said time and again that being gay is a sin and all those who choose that lifestyle are going straight to hell. The God that I know is a benevolent and kind God who loves all of his children and created all of us in his image and likeness. That is still true, right? And God loves everyone all the time for no reason and he will never forsake any of his children. This is also still true, right? So what is all the gay bashing about coming from these so called "saved" individuals. How can you look at another human being, who is a living breathing, beautiful individual and say "You're going straight to hell." What? You mean to tell me that priests and pastors who have molested countless children, engaged in fornication, adultery and not to mention greed are going to heaven because they have repented and asked for forgiveness so  therefore they have a first class ticket to go see the Lord? Really? Meanwhile, someone who lives a good life, abides by the law, prays, and operates like everyone else is going straight to hell because they are gay? I beg your pardon? That doesn't sound like the loving merciful God to me.

In the past few weeks the world's attention has been caught by one young man's suicide. Tyler Clementi  was one of the latest victims of bullying and a violation of rights because he was gay. What is that about? What is the epidemic about? Is it new? Of course it is not new, but now because there are more GLBTQ groups around the plight is eased a little bit. When we think gay, we often imagine hardcore lesbians with bad hair cuts and wrangler jeans, or an extremely feminine man with bad makeup and a red feather boa.WAKE UP!!!! Gay, Lesbian, Transgendered and Bi-sexual people can look like anything. They aren't spectacles and they don't have to walk around with a sign that says....I AM GAY! Lately many celebrities have come out to talk about their own horror stories about being bullied because they were gay. However, just as many of them come out to speak out it seems like another gay attack occurs, and each more brutal than the next. Why?

I have heard people close to me say being gay is so nasty, its unnatural, its an abomination and the worst thing a person could do to their families. As Kyle from Glee asked, "Who the hell would choose to be ridiculed, abused and laughed at?" Some people may argue that there is no way that you could be born like that because it is unnatural. However, unnatural according to who or what? The religious books? If you are going to say its wrong because the bible said so, one of my eyebrows will go up and my mouth will form into a frown. The bible, the same tool that has been used to oppress, scare and intimidate poor people for centuries? That bible? The same bible that justified slavery and the abuse of women? Yea, I am going to go with no on this one because I refuse to turn my back on a beautiful group of people because the bible told me so. Let's not forget that the bible also says to love everyone as you love yourself.

What does Pure Peace say? Pure Peace promotes loving everyone all the time for no reason because love is always the answer. No one deserves to be punished or shamed because of a choice that was not theirs to begin with. Pure Peace doesn't recognizes all paths to GOD and love is our religion. We love everyone and we believe that everyone deserves to live in peace no matter who they are in this lifetime and we do NOT believe in punishing anyone for who they are.

If you or someone you know is having a hard time with being comfortable in their own skin and needs some light in their life, please have them contact Pure Peace Life Coaching.

You can reach us at:

Telephone: 201-500-7146

Love is the answer

Saturday, October 9, 2010

For My Friends

The room spins for Ruben
As he's kicked again and again
His ribs crack
And his teeth click clack on the concrete
He hears his cheek bone break as his head is smashed on the bricks
He hopes this is a nightmare he can cure with cookies and milk
Across town J formerly Jesse
Is being tested by a group of men
Who hate to see her with her woman
They push her around
As she swings with precision
She kncks one in the face
But before she can get the satisfaction
Her knees bang the sidewalk
As she doubles over in pain from a kick to the tummy
From one of these assholes
They yank back her hair
And unzip their flies
The skinniest one wants to prove himself
He takes out his "prize"
And shoves it in her face
J gave him the bite of his life
Instantly she's knocked out
Uptown a gangsta wants to prove he's down
But they found out that he's on the low down
So they doused him in bleach to make him weak
And plunged his ass
So they could hear him cry
Made him strip
So they could steal his pride
By raping him over and over again of his dignity
They tell him no one will care about a maricon
A faggot
A dick sucker
And a child molester
He's a dirty little sinner
And this was his motha fucking hell
In the background on the news
A kid from Jersey killed himself
By jumping off the bridge
He was so ashamed
And so sad
That he saw no light at the end of his plight
So he ended it all with a flight to the depths of the Hudson
They say he was going to hell anyway
Those who say it's a sin to be gay
They say there's no mercy for Tyler or any other
Because their sins are greater than life itself
It doesn't matter if it's Tyler, Ruben, Jay, Jessica, Tyrone or Javier or Lynn
They all deserve a listening ear
The deserve protection
And a right to exist in peace
How dare anyone say they go to hell
Nah y'all can go to hell
Because God made them too
God made them in his image and likeness
And no one can say otherwise
The real crime and sin is that this is someone's child
Someone's precious person
And we say their life is worth less because they want to kiss men
No one deserves to be shamed for loving who they choose
No one deserves death for being a fag
They deserve life because they are human 

Friday, October 1, 2010

To Be Inspired

Inspiration comes from so many different places for me and my inspirations and aspirations have changed as I have grown. I remember being thirteen years old and my biggest inspiration at the time was Usher. Yes, Usher Raymond the singer. I figured that anyone so cute and sweet could hopefully one day be My Boo and I'll be the one he wants to have his relationship with. Usher inspired me to look for that perfect love he wrote about in his songs. Needless to say at thirteen I did not find it.

At eighteen years old I was introduced to an organization at Hunter College called SLAM (The Student Liberation Action Movement), I was inspired, mesmerized and down for the cause. SLAM planted the seeds of my revolutionary mind. SLAM opened up my eyes for the first time to really see America from a critical and analytical view through the eyes of the Civil Rights Movement and the people who fought for a livable wage, proper education, books over bombs and the list goes on. I was inspired by these group of students who took it upon themselves to raise awareness about the injustices at Hunter, NYC, NYS, USA and the whole world. I took action by protesting in the streets but more importantly my poetry flourished and grew into a force to be reckoned with. My words were strong, determined and powerful enough to capture the attention of many people. The quest for justice inspire me.

In 2005 at the age of 22 I started teaching GED in the Bronx to students who had not only been out of school for a very long time, but many of them had a hard time reading, they had felonies, some had children and many had parents who were absent or of no assistance to them. I was the same age or slightly older than many of my students, so my job was a little intimidating. However, I can only be me and I was highly trained and very skilled at my job so I just did what I do best, which is teach with compassion and respect. After only a few weeks of teaching my first GED class I was so moved. I would go home to my first apartment and really cry because the obstacles that my students had to overcome were greater than anything I could have seen in multiple lifetimes. Our program was completely voluntary so despite the odds stacked again them they still chose to come to school to change at least some of those odds. Every time I left my classroom I was so moved by the diligence and determination of my students. Of the ten students who took the GED from the very first class, seven of them passed all sections the very first time and the other three only failed one section. They went on to pass the other section six weeks later. If that didn't inspire me I didn't know what would.

I continued teaching GED but my demographic changed to teen parents. That element was powerful to watch because many of my students had no reliable childcare and they had to bring their children to class with them. To see young moms and dads with such a drive and a willingness to come to school no matter what was so inspiring that they made me a better teacher. After all, what did I have to complain about? I watched them come in and work their butts off because they wanted to be a parent that that child could look up to and be inspired by. If no one else was inspired I was. I am still inspired because I keep up with many of them on Facebook and to see their progress and the strides they have made since passing the GED is beautiful. Many of them have steady jobs, they are raising their children beautifully and some are seeking careers. The thought of their growth moves me to tears.

Although GED will forever be something I am interested in my inspiration now comes from several different places. I have to credit Oprah for being a HUGE inspiration. She rose from poverty, abuse and many doubts to be a solitary powerhouse who has inspired millions to transform their lives. They told her she couldn't and she said WATCH ME!!! That is pretty much where I am in life...WATCH ME!!! I am inspired to work for myself because I want my beautiful, little unborn daughter to know her mom as someone who stopped playing by someone else's rules and created my own game. I want her to get that anything you give your to and breathe life into, it becomes yours. My husband is also starting his own business because he too is done playing someone else's game. He inspires me because he works hard 24 hours of the day, even in his sleep his mind is working and creating ideas.

To be inspired is a beautiful thing. It can come from anywhere and once it hits you, its impossible for you to not take action. To be inspired is the have life breathed into you. A brand new breath of air. So that you can successfully pursue something that have always wanted to. I am inspired by my family, my friends, Oprah but I must say that my greatest inspiration of my life has been my students. They have pushed me to be a greater person and teacher. They took me out of my comfort zone and pushed me beyond any limits I set for myself. I am thankful for the experience. Now....WATCH ME!!!!